Rough Days Ahead…

Everyone told me there would be good days and bad. That every moment I had would be up in the air. How I feel will change day to day and then somedays I will have nothing to say. There will be days of joy and bliss but there will always be something amiss.
How can I smile when somedays I dont even want to open my eyes?
Or how do I stand up when my knees feel so weak? I struggle somedays just to get out of bed but no one sees that as I hide it well…I start some days with a lump in my throat and hope no one notices. I hope they dont notice the tears building up…My heart is big, but it has scars, some are deep and some are small but they remind me just how strong I am on the days I feel down… Sometimes its the only thing that gets me through. I just didn’t believe the words spoken to me, about rough days ahead filled with sadness at times. I naively thought I would be just fine but it turns out ‘just fine’ did not bode to well for me because it seems day after day my heart aches in a way that cannot be healed. I leave my trust and faith in my God above to get me through these rough days ahead so that I can truly smile instead.

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12 thoughts on “Rough Days Ahead…

  1. I have never commented on your posts. I have not lost a child. I do however have a VERY DEAR Family Member (& her ex hubby were still close) that DID… She lived 52 days. In suffering. I know that there are NO WORDS to console your pain. I know that TIME may NOT heal this one–but, i can tell you this: I watch my cousin suffer in silence. I watched her go to grief couselling and PRACTISE every single one of the exercises they told her to: -journalling, counsell for her an hubby, writing letters, statrring scrapbooks(reluctantly at times) -lighting candles in memory -whatever the action was her counselors said to do; she did it and it moment b moment shifted certain perceptions in her beliefs and feelings–even it shifted the pain justfor a DAY…. I pray for you BOTH & your personal grieving and healing processes… Time will pass and the pain might bot hange but, its frequency does xoxo sending support love an prayers from canada

  2. I have never commented on your posts. I have not lost a child. I do however have a VERY DEAR Family Member (& her ex hubby were still close) that DID… She lived 52 days. In suffering. I know that there are NO WORDS to console your pain. I know that TIME may NOT heal this one–but, i can tell you this: I watch my cousin suffer in silence. I watched her go to grief couselling and PRACTISE every single one of the exercises they told her to: -journalling, counsell for her an hubby, writing letters, statrring scrapbooks(reluctantly at times) -lighting candles in memory -whatever the action was her counselors said to do; she did it and it moment b moment shifted certain perceptions in her beliefs and feelings–even it shifted the pain justfor a DAY…. I pray for you BOTH & your personal grieving and healing processes… Time will pass and the pain might bot hange but, its frequency does xoxo sending support love an prayers from canada

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